Authenticity

I am posed with questions.
What does it mean to be authentic? Does a workout or run count if I don't post it on facebook? Am I the person praying in he window for all to see, or am I off in a quiet place for my own reasons. Am I of service for others with a pat on the back in mind or do things without expectations?

 We are in a digital age where we can present our best selves to the world. Posting our best runs, our "I'm up before you" workouts or "My day would not be complete without prayer". Everyday can be a first date with the world.  I will borrow from Chris Rock, in saying that "On a first date, you are not there, you send your representative". Your best you! Not the everyday you. Not the one that forgets to say thank you, or leaves the toilet seat up.  You want to present a you, without flaws. The you, you wish you could be.

 So how much "Authenticity" do I have if everything is great? I remember back some time ago "Epic" was a popular word that made it's way into all of my conversations. "Dude the waves were epic, aw man, me and my gf had an epic fight, this concert will be epic" Blah blah blah....... At age 46 I think I was able to truly use the word epic in proper context. People would ask how as Egypt and all I could sum up at time was "it was Epic".

 I have learned so many things in the last 18 years of my life. All of which can be rooted in sobriety and working with other sober people. I am not going to stand on my soap box and cry out that AA is the only path in life, but I will say that it is what works for me. Some of the best advice I have ever had has been "take what you need and leave the rest".

One of the true pleasures I get from recovery is self reflection. Many folks not in recovery do not get he time or even the opportunity for self reflection. My sobriety demands it. It is one of the steps I hold near and dear to my emotional life. Am I good at saying "hey, it's time to look inward?". Hell no! Most every time I get in a spot of discomfort and rant about some "thing" that is bothering me. It is my sponsor or one of my good friends that will remind me to look at "my part" in the situation.
Owning my part in a bad situation is my way to freedom.

These are the kinds of things I think about!